Juggler of words and children…collector of pottery shards
“Why are you staring at me?” my 13-year-old asked with a twinkle in her eye.
I shook my head, and blinked away tears as I reached out to pull her close. I closed my eyes as I buried my face in her dreadlocks to kiss the top of her head.
She pulled back to look into my face and giggled.
“Mom! You are crying! What’s going on?”
I smiled back at her, embarrassed by my sudden onslaught of sentimentality.
“I…am just so glad you are here…”
It has been more than eight years now since that miraculous night in December when we brought her home from Haiti at last. She was five-years-old, fragile, traumatized, and more than a little bit angry.
Angry at me, mostly.
Why? There doesn’t have to be a “why”. She had lost everything. That is “why” enough.
Her homecoming was a miracle nonetheless. I remember looking over at her on the late night flight after she had finally drifted off to sleep, realizing that though I didn’t know how we were going to traverse the choppy waters of adjustment ahead, I did know one thing: She was my baby, and we would make it by God’s grace somehow.
More than eight years later and grace has flowed like a mighty river. I have made so many mistakes, and offered even more apologies. I have loved her fiercely.
And by God’s amazing grace…here she is. Beautiful. Confident. Determined and strong. She’s just good, you know?
That is why, every once and awhile, I have a moment when the chaos of rearing five children silences for a holy moment and I realize that I am living a miracle beside her every single day because, she is here. This one for whom I begged God for two long years, is here.
Have you ever thought about how easy it is for us to become numb to God’s great blessings in our lives? The daily roar of all that is urgent in our lives drowns out the glory and beauty of God’s grace toward us and and we simply forget all He has done for us.
Today, I want to slow it all down. I want to pause to be thankful moment by moment. As I do, I am confident I will find with Gerald Manley Hopkins that “All the world is charged with the grandeur of God.”